I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
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