I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Randomize
