He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
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