we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize