I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Randomize
