That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
Randomize
