Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
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