well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
29 “I’m Getting Old” Moments
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
19 Worst Song Lyrics of All Time
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend