sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
These 19 People Are Into The Grossest Sex Fetishes
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
People Weigh In On Whether It’s Okay to Bang Your Roommate
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.