marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
Randomize
