So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
Randomize
