Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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