porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
