how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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