he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
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