Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
I just walked into my kitchen and my little brother is standing with his face two inches from the clock, staring at it, and eating an apple. I asked wtf he was doing and he just goes "the hour hand is moving VERY slowly".
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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