Whod you bang
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
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