Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
Shame - the story of my life.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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