speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
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