The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
Randomize