How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
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