I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
I just gargled with NyQuil
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