yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Randomize
