He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Randomize
