We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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