The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize
