is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
