and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Randomize
