He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
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