I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
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