I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
Hey just wanted to let you know my nose is broken and I have a fractured wrist. I told you it wasn't a slip and slide.
Dude I didn't think you'd do it. I mean come on, who puts a slip and slide on their driveway?
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I'm gonna fight the coyote
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
Randomize
