Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
you win again, gameday.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
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