I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
Hey
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GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
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