Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
