you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
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