The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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