all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
