SEEEEXXX PLEASE
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
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