JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
it's like iHOP with fire
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Holy sore nipples Batman
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
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