You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
Randomize
