Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
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