There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
He had one of those small greek statue penises
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
