oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
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