Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
Randomize
