The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
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