Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Randomize
