Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
Randomize
