I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
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