So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
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