On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
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