drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
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apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
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