So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
Randomize
