yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize
